EDITOR'S NOTE: During my trip I periodically sent emails describing
my adventures to a group of friends, relatives and co-workers who had
previosly indicated that they would not be bored or offended by them.
This is my first message, sent after I returned from Ha Long Bay to Hanoi.
Greetings Comrades!
Today's message is coming to you from the Socialist Republic of
Vietnam. I arrived in Hanoi on Sunday night and was finally reunited
with my suitcase. Then I took it up to my room and found out that
somewhere between Washington, Addis Ababa, Bangkok, Yangon,
Bangkok, and Hanoi, someone had screwed up the lock on the suitcase and
I couldn't open it! However, a helpful hotel employee used a couple of
tools (a hammer and sickle, I think) and cut off the lock. My two days
since then have convinced me that I could
have probably survived quite nicely without the suitcase anyway.
Hanoi is just like you would have imagined it if the US had *won* the
Vietnam war. Full of hipsters on motorcycles sipping lattes at corner
cafes while sporting the latest fashions. (By the way, for some reason,
here they don't refer to it as the "Vietnam"
war--go figure. Actually, I haven't been in Hanoi that long. After
checking into my (luxurious) hotel on Sunday night and chowing down at
the Little Hanoi Bistro, I left the next morning for an overnight cruise
on Halong Bay. Now would be a good opportunity
for you to Google "Halong Bay" to see what it looks like. Spectacular
scenery, and I got to witness a Karaoke competition between 15
Taiwanese--these people are professionals--don't mess with them. They
tried all night to get me onstage, but it would take
enough liquor to make me pass out before I would do that. The other
interesting thing about the cruise was that they were continually
playing Christmas music during meals--not just the Jingle Bells stuff,
but real religious stuff. Ho Chi Minh must be spinning
in his grave, a fact which I can confirm the day after tomorrow, when I
visit his mausoleum.
Engrish of the day (yes, I said Engrish--Google it). When I arrived at
the Hanoi airport the car that the guide had was a brand I had never
heard of. He said it was a Korean brand. When I mentioned that they
didn't have that brand in the United States, he
said "Many people in United States drive Rekshit? You know, Toyota
make Rekshit?"
Anyway, my gracious hosts are treating me well, and I hope all of you
imperialist lackeys are doing well. Long live the revolution!
Next: On my Own in Hanoi
